Are you willing to hear what you need to hear to go where you want to go? It sounds simple, but let’s be honest it’s not. I know it’s not because I’ve struggled with it myself. There are times when my pride and emotions make it hard to embrace the truths I need to hear. What about you?
I also think about the people who are quick to tell me what I need to hear but aren’t willing to embrace those same truths themselves. Did you catch that? Before we examine others, we need to examine ourselves.
When I take a hard look at myself, I see strengths but I also see areas that need work. One lesson I’ve learned, often the hard way, is how to work with people I fundamentally disagree with. When I say "fundamentally," I mean at the core whether it’s about their views on helping the poorest and most marginalized or their unwillingness to tackle tough conversations about change.
I have a deep need to remind people that we don’t have to accept the status quo. But even as I write these words, I remind myself of something equally important: everyone has a purpose. There is good, even when I don’t see it right away.
This willingness to hear what you need to hear applies not just to personal growth but to businesses as well. Over the past six years in banking, I’ve seen this truth play out again and again: many business owners don’t want to hear what’s necessary to achieve their goals they just want to hear yes.
But here’s the reality: Getting to yes requires preparation, structure, and sometimes unlearning old habits.
The biggest gap I see isn’t a lack of drive, creativity, or operational know-how. It’s a tolerance for a lack of structure and financial acumen. Many entrepreneurs have spent so long just “running the business” that they’ve neglected the foundational infrastructure needed for sustainability.
And here’s the thing many don’t want to be told:
“This is what’s necessary to qualify.”
“This is what’s needed to make this enterprise sustainable beyond you.”
Let me share a story. Years ago, I had a conversation with my wife’s uncle, who had retired from the Corps of Engineers and was running his own business. I was in my mid-20s, eager to learn, and curious about his plans for the future of his business. But when I asked him, he didn’t have an answer. He was a solo operator, focused on getting through each day, with no systems or processes in place to ensure the business could thrive beyond him.
That robust business eventually languished and faded not because he lacked hard work or capability, but because he hadn’t built the infrastructure to sustain it.
When my colleagues and I work with business owners, we focus on telling them what they need to hear not just what they want to hear. If you’re serious about becoming creditworthy, scaling your operations, sustaining your business, or passing it on to the next generation, you must be willing to face some tough truths.
As someone who calls himself an "accidental banker," I find it fascinating how often people unfamiliar with financial institutions get stuck on the basics. And here’s the thing: these basics? They’re not just required for dealing with banks. They’re essential even if you’re borrowing money from your cousin.
Here’s what every lender needs to know:
How will the lender get paid back? (Cash flow)
If cash flow isn’t enough, what’s the backup plan? (Collateral)
How can we trust your numbers? (Paystubs, audited financial statements, tax returns)
How much do you owe others? (Debt levels)
Have you paid your debt in the past? (Character)
At the end of the day, every lender is asking one critical question: How and when am I going to get paid back?
But here’s the thing these questions aren’t just for banks. They’re questions you should be asking yourself. Can you answer them? Take a moment to ponder these questions, because they’re not just about getting a loan they’re about your business’s sustainability and its ability to scale.
And here’s my advice: Ask for help before you need it. Did you hear me? Don’t wait until you need a loan. Get in line and build a relationship with a financial institution now. It doesn’t matter if your future needs are business or personal start building that relationship today.
Now that I’ve made my plea, let me leave you with this: The truth is, hearing these questions and tackling them head-on is essential for growth. I believe you have a business in you. Stop thinking about it and take action. But let’s do it the right way. Build on a solid foundation.
Because when you come my way, I’m not going to tell you what you want to hear I’m going to tell you what you need to hear. Whether it’s about cash flow, collateral, or your ability to produce accurate financial statements, the willingness to confront these challenges can be the difference between a business that merely survives and one that thrives.
The only way I’ve grown personally, professionally, and as a leader is by listening to the truths I didn’t want to hear. It’s not easy. Growth requires discomfort. It requires hearing hard truths and taking action on them.
So, let me ask you again: Are you willing to hear what you need to hear to go where you want to go?
Whether it’s in your personal life, your business, or your leadership journey, success begins with the hard conversations we often avoid. It starts with hearing what’s necessary and then doing what’s needed.