Today, I’m grateful for laughter, even in the midst of loss. I spent time with Aunt Vannessa, my wife’s aunt and the mother of Fred, sitting on her porch in North St. Louis City. We talked about many things: her son, who she loved deeply, and who she says “worked himself to death,” and the transformation he was trying to make by becoming an entrepreneur.

Last year, my wife and I noticed Fred had a new kind of hustle. He wanted to start a last-mile delivery business, but he was renting a car for $2,000 a week, working nonstop yet ending with almost nothing. We decided to invest in him by helping him purchase a utility vehicle. We didn’t buy it outright, we collateralized the loan to help him build credit and discipline.

During our porch conversation, we discussed how hard he had been working over the past six months, and then the topic shifted to something we often overlook, beneficiaries. Fred had none listed for his car or other assets. That meant if he passed, the car would go through probate, losing value through attorney and administrative fees.

We reflected on how often this happens, people buy property or assets without titling them correctly, naming beneficiaries, or setting up transfers upon death. The result? Families lose value they worked hard to create. My wife shared a story about a friend whose mother passed away owning a $5,000 property. By the time it was sorted, $7,500 in fees had eaten away any value, because the family couldn’t agree.

Aunt Vannessa, ever resourceful, reminded me of the power of making the most of what you have. As a poor Black woman, she has stretched every dollar, leveraged relationships, and even gained homeownership. She proudly showed us her new central air, something she had wanted for years and finally received through a local program. It was a reminder that wise preparation for the future is a form of love for those we leave behind.

 “Be sure you know the condition of your flocks, give careful attention to your herds; for riches do not endure forever…”

— Proverbs 27:23–24