When I first started at the bank, I had more than a few sleepless nights. I’m naturally restless, but I remember lying awake at 2 or 3 a.m., my mind racing with "what-ifs." It would start with a single thought, “What if I’m not enough?”, and quickly spiral into a flood of worries. Would I fit in? Could I prove myself? Was I going to meet others' expectations, or even my own? What’s the next move?

When I flunked second grade, I washumiliated. I didn’t want to go back. My stomach twisted in knots, my face burned with shame, and my chest felt heavy like a weight I couldn’t shake. I preferred to go with mom, who had recently died, than face my class.

Now, let’s be clear, I didn’t know the word humiliated back then, but here’s what I felt. I felt deeply embarrassed, I thought I was a dumb, stupid kid. I was ashamed. It wasn’t enough that I didn’t have parents; I also felt ashamed because of that, because I was different from the rest. It reminds me of that hook in Kendrick Lamar's song "Not Like Us", well, I wasn’t like them. I felt powerless in my circumstance, and it was public because I had to go back to school the next year. Even after my mom died and I moved a block over, it wasn’t far enough to be in a different school. So, I was trying to adjust to being "not like us" on my new street and in my new class, all in plain view of my old class.

When I went to college, I repeated the cycle, I flunked out again. And all of the sadness from those early years came flooding back. But the stakes were different this time, my future was on the line. I have felt that same gnawing in the pit of my stomach during job interviews I’ve just blown. Don’t tell me I’m the only one. I know scripture says, "Do not be anxious," but let me tell you, sometimes my body does what it does, and I have to really center myself to regain control.

But one thing has never failed me, resilience. Even when I have fallen short, which is just temporary failure, because mindset is everything, I have never attached permanence to negative experiences. Even when I have temporarily failed, there was an even more intense gnawing inside me saying, "I am going to prove the bastards wrong." You heard me. I have carried a fire within me, refusing to let circumstances dictate my worth. I was not born a nobody, I was born with a purpose, and I was going to prove it.

Did you catch that?

I wanted to be somebody because at some point, a priest at my local church read words to me from the Bible. I remember sitting on a worn wooden pew, feeling an unfamiliar sense of hope as he spoke about purpose and divine design. Those words stuck with me, igniting a spark that would later guide my journey. And when I started reading for myself, interpreting for myself, I found that it said God knew me before I was born. Can you believe it? The Bible said that God designed and created us with purpose.

I struggled with that, I have to tell you, because I couldn’t see how I could have a big purpose when I was born into a community that so many had written off. We knew the world had written us off, just listen to the songs back then. But then, I went back to this God and this Bible, which said I had a purpose and there was a plan for my life.

I love that passage in Proverbs 16:3, "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans."

I believe this passage was in my spirit before anything else. At every juncture when I have been rejected, at every juncture when I have been tested, at every juncture when I have been stressed, I have said, "Lord, if this is for me, I’m doing my part, you do yours. And if it is not for me, shut it down."

And while I wait for the message, I don’t sit idle. I keep moving forward, keep committing myself to the work, honoring Him.

Did you catch that?

I kept committing myself to the work, honoring Him.

This is what got me out of high school. This is what got me through college. This is what kept me focused when I faced challenges being accepted into my biggest roles. Do you realize I wasn’t supposed to be CEO of any organization I’ve had the privilege to lead? There has always been someone else in queue. I have always struggled with whether I was ready, worthy, and mentally resourced. But I have never struggled with believing that I was spiritually resourced. Because even with anxiety, even with missteps, I kept putting my faith into action.

This same fight is in you. You’ve overcome before, so what’s stopping you now? Will you allow this moment to break you, or will you rise, stronger and wiser? It’s time to stand up and step forward.

Reframe your thinking.

As a kid, I loved Michael Jordan. Jordan’s relentless work ethic and refusal to let failure define him made him one of the greatest athletes of all time. His story exemplifies that failure isn’t the opposite of success, it’s part of the journey. I remember thinking I could never be Michael Jordan on the court, but it didn’t prevent me from trying to be like Mike. Then I realized, I could be my own Mike. My gift was different.

Your gift is different. Whether it’s your ability to inspire, create, lead, or serve, you are operating in your God-given purpose. Embrace it and let it shine. Your gift is going to make a way for you.

You might be winded, wounded, but don’t stay down, as long as you have breath in your body.

#ResilienceInAction #FaithAndPurpose #OvercomingAdversity #MindsetMatters #RiseStronger